Raising Leaders

The second Wednesday of every month has been designated as our class presidency meeting/Personal Progress night.  We have so few girls in our YW that it makes more sense to gather as a group than as classes.  In conjunction with our meetings, we have a leadership training mini-lesson.

The leadership training was presented by one of my counselors, Joanna.   It was extemporaneous, and yet so organized and definitely led by the Spirit.  The following comes from my notes:

Definition of leadership--someone who takes responsibility for the whole, whether you have a title/calling or not.  Do you take responsibility for the group and its success?

There are three basic rules for good leadership:

1)  Listen/be discerning--when you walk into a room, you should think, "What are the needs of the people in this room?"

                The girls' recognition of the needs of our group were:
                          There are lots of girls who should be here who aren't.
                          Some need help remembering why they came to the Gospel in the first place.
                          Everyone needs a place of refuge and acceptance.
                          The reason why we need to attend our meetings is to get in tune with the Spirit.
                          The girls are in different places in their lives--how can we reach them?

2)  How do I connect these people with the resources they need to answer their needs?

                           For the active girls, are we doing enough to help them?
                           For inactives, there are as many reasons as girls as to why they don't come.
                           Several of the girls on our roster are not even baptized.  They are on our rolls because
                             they have a parent who is a member.

3)  How can I do that in a way that honors people's agency?

                            This can be difficult to remember, as there is such a push in quorums, Relief Societies,
                             ward councils and other groups to go out there and bring back the "lost sheep", often
                             with less concern as to what that sheep's needs are.  We can't know what those needs                                  are until we get to know the people.

                            Unless we ourselves know why we are coming to church and are converted, we can't                                   really expect other people to want to join us, and we can't really love others unless we                                   are following Christ.

That's Why They Call It a Challenge

Years ago, I was part of a university committee that monitored student progress.  Two of the deans were sitting near me at one meeting, talking about two upperclassmen that violated the law in some way and were being held in the county jail.  Dean Victor visited the young men in the pokey, and sharing his experience with  Dean Joe.

Dean Victor:  I felt so sorry for them!  The conditions there were terrible—no privacy, tough people, overcrowding….

Dean Joe (looking incredulous):  That’s why they call it JAIL, Vic!  It’s not supposed to be easy.

I think about that whenever I or someone else expresses surprise and/or dismay when a challenging situation arises.  That's why they call it a challenge, Vic!! 

On Sunday, I presented the weekly challenge to my Young Women.  I told them that they had the power to change the world.  They received handouts with the cute picture of the globes with the, "She believed she could, so she did" motto.  The story of Nephi's response to the challenge to build a boat was recounted. Laman and Lemuel's negative reaction was mentioned.   I told them that I once was told by someone that I would never get into medical school, but look how that prediction turned out.  They can change the world and don't ever let anyone tell you that you can't.

My challenge to them was to think of a way they could change their world this week.  Maybe it's just the beginning of a big goal, or a little thing they want to work on just for the week.  I also asked for some help with my goal, which is to go and visit the less-active girls.  There were some excited faces, and even some tears from my most sensitive YW.  She left the room, and when I found her, she said, "I have a lot of things to think about".  I think that's great!!   Challenges should make you think.  They should make you cry sometimes, or get angry.  If it was easy and all, "La la la.  Skippity-doo-dah," then it wouldn't be a challenge, now would it?

It's too bad my teary Laurel didn't stay for class, because one of my amazing counselors gave the lesson, "Personal Purity Through Self-Discipline".  It dovetailed perfectly with the challenge theme.  And one of our girls had a terrific "AHA!" moment about how being disciplined actually gives you more freedom in life.  It makes me teary to remember that moment.  Oh how I love my girls and my leaders!

What are you challenging yourself to do this week?  If you are a leader, are you issuing any challenges?

I love that people are reading the blog.  Please feel free to comment.  It makes for a better dialogue and interesting new posts.

Change the World!

Young Women in Excellence (YWIE) is looming.  I'm not sure exactly how we are going to present it, but one thing is clear to me:  I want the theme to be "Change the World!"  I was inspired by Sis. Elaine Dalton's talk at the Young Women Inservice, and from a quote from a devotional talk she gave at BYU-Idaho:

     "Your lives of preparation, righteousness, courage and purity will change the world!"

The purpose of  YWIE, according to Handbook 2, is to recognize the young women for the good things they are doing, as well as celebrating Personal Progress.  We need to sit the Young Women down and see what they have done with Personal Progress in the last few months.  What I really do not want is a Young Women in Excellence where only a few YW are highlighted because they were the ones that have earned ribbons for their scriptures to show that they have completed a Value. Our YW are doing good things in their lives, and they need to be encouraged in and recognized for those things.

I want the girls to realize that they can change the world, from where they stand out to the wide world.  I want to do all I can to help the girls know that they are empowered as they go forward to change their circumstances, change the people around them for the better, and help others change the world.  They will have the faith and courage to dare to do great things as they embrace the Gospel.

I was thinking that perhaps, instead of a spiritual thought during Opening Exercises, we would challenge the girls each week to do something to do something great.  Maybe they will decide to go visit one of the less-active girls.  I really want to encourage that, because girls will want to come to activities and Sunday meetings if they feel like they have a friend there.  Perhaps they will take the time to speak to someone that looks like they need a kind word.  Or maybe they want to set a goal to do well in their classes, and they need to really push themselves to work hard to improve their grades.  Or whatever they feel they need to do to stretch, to grow, and to change their world for the better.

Readers, what do you think about this?  I think my idea is not fully-formed yet.  Personal Progress is perfect to incorporate into the challenge.  Perhaps our girls need to see Personal Progress in a new light in order to recommit to the program.

Lead Me, Guide Me

I am a physician with a busy practice, a wife, a step-mother of three terrific young adults, a sometime-triathlete, an electric bass-player, and a newly-called ward Young Women's president.  This blog is a place for me to talk about ideas and issues related to leading an group of young ladies through what can be wonderful, treacherous and wonderfully-treacherous times.  My goal is to help them develop their testimonies and become strong, faithful, LDS women and leaders.

Fortunately, I spent the past year as a counselor in the YW presidency.  This gave me at least a passing understanding of the time and effort involved in the calling.  I knew that I needed to have a terrific board whose strengths fill in my weak points.

Lots of prayer, thought, fasting, thought, prayer and thought went into the selection of the YW board.  Everyone that came to my mind was called and accepted their callings willingly.  They definitely are what I and the girls need.  They are deep thinkers, intelligent, thoughtful, creative and loving.  I feel like we are on the same page when it comes to where we need to go with the girls.

One of my counselors asked what I needed her to do, after our first presidency meeting.  My answer was, "Pray.  Study your scriptures.  Read the Handbook.  Go online to lds.org, read and watch everything you can in the Young Women section."  That was the way that I wanted all of us to start.  Get the overall vision of Young Women's from the General YW Presidency, then figure out what our YW need.

Our ward demographics skew to the "newly-wed and nearly-dead", giving us a small group of youth.  I have known most of them since they were in Primary and I was the Primary president.  We have fifteen girls on our roster, of which approximately half attend church regularly or semi-regularly.  Our girls are also very active in sports, music and other extracurricular activities.  This makes planning activities a little tough.  One thing that I knew would be important was transitioning from having the leaders plan all of the activities and events to having the girls be the planners.  Not only do I feel like they will be more likely to come to activities and bring their friends if it is something that they want to do, it will teach them important leadership skills.  I'd like them to feel comfortable calling someone and asking them to be a guest instructor if they want to learn a new skill, or contacting an organization to ask about and schedule a service project, or working together to come to a mutually-acceptable decision on what activities to pursue, or cultivate a new talent through an activity.

This transition will take some time for the girls to get used to and good at, but I have faith in them.   I also have faith that I was called by inspiration, as was my board.  Great things are in store.  Stay tuned!